Possibly Maybe Unexpectedly

It’s Fun to be Fun! On Becoming, Places, and the New Philippine Tourism Slogan

2012-01-06T23:40:00.000-08:00

We are responsible in making our identity

It’s the people that make theplace…

I totally forgot where I firstheard this but after watching DOT Secretary Ramon Jimenez Jr. last night explainabout the new tourism slogan, this phrase popped in my head.

It’s more fun in the Philippines is our new tourism slogan which had itsdebut yesterday, January 6, 2012. While issues of it being similar to the 1951 Switzerland’stourism slogan also made rounds in social media, the fact that the way “fun”was presented is completely different. This made me love it more, the same waywhy I am optimistic for this year. If we think about it (beyond the “similarityissues”) the slogan is more than just a way to attract tourist—it’s a reminderthat what makes our place inviting is us—the people living in this country….

We, Filipinos have always beenknown to be hospitable and hardworking. More than the talent and the ingenuitymany well known Filipinos worldwide already displayed, our ability to laugh atproblems, especially our spirit of bayanihan,is what makes us shine in the eyes of those from other nations that there aresome who even decided to stay here. But with such a great concept, there arestill Filipinos who question this new slogan from how it was similar toSwitzerland’s to even how we say we are “fun” with all the said terrorism and kidnappings in some areas.

We are “fun” is an affirmationthat we can survive and rise from whatever problems we’re in…learn from our mistakes, cherish thepresent, and look forward to the future. I am very aware that many will bein opposition with what I just said especially with all the negative stuff wekeep on hearing, reading, watching from the media; but I guess I’m just one ofthe many who wish to look for a solution rather than complain. After all we canonly be the change we wish to see inthe world...

Remember that in as much as we haveno control of many things, there are some which we still are and that is ourselves. We can never be in control ofother people’s feelings and thoughts, the same way we have no control over Nature.But God gave us freewill to think, observe, and work with our present. OUR own present…

It is only when we commit ourselves
to be the person we want to be,
rather that the type we do not wish to be,
can we only influence those around us…

Take note: influence—not dictate, notcontrol and most especially notlive their lives for them…

Notice this: A person whom manypeople wish to associate with is someone who usually gives solutions ratherthan blame and question someone else. He is the “I can be” person rather thanthe “what if” (since this simply means he’s living in the past). We call them understanding, mature, selfless, smart, butactually they are people who don’t even care what others are saying behindtheir backs. They are people who continue to live life happily, knowing thatthey are working to be the best person they can be without causing harm toothers but rather help. They also have their downs but they know how to move on.That what makes them fun to be with…because we learn fromthem and because they are less stressful to be with…

The world is filled withbeautiful places, but what makes each distinct from the rest are its people. Ifit’s more fun in Switzerland for the Swiss, then for me it’s definitely funhere in the Philippines too…the same way others find their own countries morefun as well. We enjoy a place not just because of the view but most especiallythe people whom we learn from and become friends with. Now, with the new tourismslogan, I claim to be a fun person as well, the same way I want to inspire many…

And as I end this writing I finally remembered where I heard my introductoryphrase: It’s from a movie where the character is an alien who fell in love withan Earthling making him love this planet more….

Possibly Maybe Unexpectedly: ON TO 2012—THANK YOU 2011!

2011-12-31T05:36:00.000-08:00

Possibly Maybe Unexpectedly: ON TO 2012—THANK YOU 2011!

ON TO 2012—THANK YOU 2011!

2011-12-31T05:23:00.000-08:00

Let's meet the 2012 with happiness in our hearts!

I don’t want to end 2011 withoutmy year-end post, especially since I didn’t get to write a blog post lastChristmas due to the power interruptions. But since that has passed and thepresent is more important, here I am, writing what I call my leap-of-faitharticle.

Leap of Faith….

I honestly have no idea what towrite except that 2011 has been a great year. I know a lot of terrible things havehappened just like the recent Typhoon Sendong incident. But just like the previous devastation that came (especially the Pinatubo incident back in 1991), I knowthat its victims will rise from this event victorious.

Life goes on. We only have to moveeither backward or forward. There’s no in-between-choice as if we’re going tostay where we are at present. Just like grabbing an opportunity, we can onlysay yes or no to it. We may not know what will become of us in the future orwhether we’ll remain victims of the things that have passed; then again whyworry about the future when the present actually makes it. We hold the present right? Of course we have toacknowledge the fact that there are things that go out of our control, butthese things have actually happened time and again already. We can thereforesay that to make a change we just have to react to events according to what wehave learned from past experiences. Some of these solutions might be consideredrisky but many have already taken this path and succeeded…

I believe 2012 will be a betteryear! I have no proof to this claim except that I have been in this situationbefore—unknowing of what 2010 or 2011 will be for me. Those years went aboutjust fine even with all the problems. Now that I mentioned them I have to admitthat today, the last day of 2011, I look back not only on the events thathappened this year but also those that came before it. It may have been aroller coaster ride with all the laughter and tears but I have to admit I cherishedit. It’s been exhilarating that I look forward to the next one called 2012,which by the way I claim to be my year (andI believe the rest should claim it theirs too). All I can do now is be thankful….

Now we are again at a point where we choose whether to make2012 a great year for us or not.

The decision is yours to make...

Not mine or someoneelse’s.

What the rest of theworld says are just options—

You are responsible for your own life

You create your own possibilities...

There have been many lessons learned and now there is so muchto share; and as I end this post let me say thank you: for the pain, for the comfort,for the discouragement and the encouragement. These are things that never failto be present every year, but what the heck! These are the things that made us cometo enjoy our “now”…the same things that should make us look forward to thefuture…

Now let’s meet this year with smiles not only on our facesbut most especially in our hearts….

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

Photo courtesy of Mrs. Joanne Gonzales Taylor

Learn the Art of Letting Go and Making Room for Something Wonderful

2011-12-05T07:58:00.001-08:00


Let go of yourself....

I just got done sorting out myclothes and throwing away old class notes to lessen clutter. Although I alsodid this last December of 2010, I have to admit that it was only recently thatI fully embraced and appreciated the art of “letting-go”. Good bye old clothesand shoes. Farewell collegiate notes. And soon I’ll be saying “so long” mybeloved books. At present, as I write this blog, I am already done planning theshopping I’ll be doing this December – getting me a good pair of dressy shoes.

I may be working at home but I dogo out too.

And although I am fully awarethat here in Sorsogon it’s enough to wear t-shirt, jeans and flip-flops, whengoing out, I refuse to be part of the norm.

Things have changed…

I am no longer the girl who oncewore t-shirt and jeans with ink stains, nor the student with her school blousesleeves rolled up to her elbows. “I am” no longer a girl in the first place…

I am presently a woman… And rightnow I am eyeing on some stores where I can get a good pair of shoes. The perfectshoes that will complete a get-up that speaks simplicity, sophistication, andindependence…description of a woman I always wanted to be and now deciding tolive it.

I’m saying “good bye” to the girlI was before and “hello” to the new and better me.

Because the art of letting go isn’t just about getting rid of things; it isalso welcoming great things.

Never settle for anything less that what you truly deserve.If you want greatness to happen into your life you have to learn how to let goof things that seem to hinder it. These are things that cause you toprocrastinate and drift off. Instead focus more on those that motivates you to gobeyond your limits such as your love ones.

There are so many possibilities out there waiting to be grabbed.

All you have to do is free your hands of the not so useful things.

Decide to take a chance on the “possibility”

that lies beyond your limits.

We never know what the future holds but we can have the life we wantby living it right now. Call it “getting used to it”. Of course you don’t haveto do it overnight but you can start by cleaning up our act:

Remove all the clutter inside your head to help you focus on the pathtowards your goals.

Pass-on great memories to friends both old and new for they containthe lessons you have learned.

And dress for success…

Many may think this as an impractical move but what make it “impractical”is you wanting results fast without even preparing yourself for it. You have todo things “consistently”: practice, learn, relearn, unlearn until you havefound the right system (way of handling things) that works best for you.

Life is so short to be wasted on worries, so let go of it too. This isthe fact we all must accept and face. It is only holding you back to expressingyour uniqueness to the world. You have to decide to be happy as you should be. Andjust like the sorting of clothes I did, especially the decision of buying newshoes, you must start sorting out thoughts and actions that will surely bringyou nothing but happiness and success. It’s time to let go and make enoughspace for that “something wonderful” that’s coming.

Photo courtesy of Alya Rodriguez

Karma is Just around the Corner: Better Be Good to Yourself

2011-11-19T07:35:00.001-08:00

Learn to see greatness in every situation

My Facebook home wall (not my profile wall) was recently bombarded by so many issues about karma from friends (well okay so I alsoposted one too just yesterday). Two of my friends posted how peoplewho did them wrong was getting the bad karma they deserve. Some friends postedquotes on karma. Others simply posted the pain they felt after karma got backat them (regarding romantic relationships) and was making them depressed. Amongall the post that was there, one post stood out as this friend started it with Karma is just around the corner….

Karma is indeed just around thecorner and is working on your life this very moment.

We have always understood whatkarma is in the saying do unto otherswhat you want others to do unto you. Actually there’s more to it than whatit says. This message simply means that you have to get yourself accustomed tolooking for positive things even in despairing and stressful situations. Trainingyourself to do this gets you programmed to see opportunities to greatness. Howwe interact with others is just a part of this process. You mustunderstand that with every good thing you do to others is actually the resultof practicing seeing greatness. You get a clear view of things making you reactto it positively. The same goes if you only see shortcomings.

Let’s consider Karma as a lab teacher. After discussingthe lessons it’s time to apply it in actual; and just like every class we’veattended in school the rule “we make our own grades” still applies in life. Our grades are based in our classperformance. If you listened very well to the lecture and made sure youassimilated the important information, you’ll definitely perform well in yourlab activities. But if you didn’t, Karma willinstruct you to repeat your experiment with every mistake you make, over andover and over again, until you get it right. In every failed experiment, youhave to check what you did wrong. You need to relearn the process to see whereyou need to make tweaks. Eventually, this will lead to the experiment’s success. If we look at karma from this point we see that it doesn’t have any bad side;only good. Karma wants you to see that what you did is wrong and that you must workyour way to making it right – really right!

We are responsible for the choices we make.

The “bad things” that came are actually the result ofhow you treated yourself.

This is the real karma.

Learn from it.

If you need to apologize for yourmistake then do it but remember to forgive yourself too. Your decisions areyours, not someone else’s. Every bad thing you do to others is actually youcausing harm to yourself. Accept your faults even if it’s hard. Learn fromsituations, whether they may be good or bad. Always remember to be good toyourself.

Photo courtesy of Alya Rodriguez 

Baby Steps to Greatness: Start by Making Good Habits

2011-11-11T21:38:00.001-08:00

It's the things you do today that make-up your future

Myuncle once gave the most important tip in studying effectively: read and understand the book from cover tocover “literally”. Whether it’s the copyright’s page, the index, the tableof contents, the edition, or just the testimonials, reading these can greatlyhelp in assimilating the lessons the author wrote in his book. He told me thisafter quizzing me with what I was reading – an Engineering book which I wassurprised to see he understood more even if his profession was lined up inpolitical science (take note he just read it then and there). It was then thatI saw what was wrong with my study habits (particularly my reading). I love toread and did very well in class; but I could have performed even better.

I haveread so many books and finished these fast but after that meeting I realized Iwas just scanning them, not completely “reading” them. Since then I startedreading books “from cover to cover”. I didn’t skip the acknowledgements, theforeword, the copyright’s page, even the so-called “least important details” onnewspaper and magazine articles. It may be hard at first and may have been moretime consuming, but after it I became more conscious with my reading choiceseven with purchasing books.

Just like not skipping the smallestand what most of us call “least important” details in books, making big changesin your life starts by giving importance even with the smallest decisions you make. For me, changing how I read books made me select the best readingmaterials and made my study habits more effective (I understood thelessons more). This also affected how I think about certain situation and how Ianalyze it—even people’s behaviors. It made me more observant which eventuallyled me to take an interest in the teaching and fall more in-love with writing.

When you want to make thingshappen you have to start by taking baby steps. There is no overnightsuccess formula. You can’t lose a hundred pounds after a month (healthy weightlost that is), and you can’t accumulate wealth either that fast (even lotterywinners know this since they have to make plans on spending their winningswisely to be truly successful with it).

Darren Hardy discussed in hisbook, The Compound Effect, how habits can change your life dramatically. Fromgetting a more fit body to your work performance, even in finding yourpotential partner in life; everything starts from the smallest and so-calledleast important decisions you make. If you want to lose weight you have to giveyourself at least five minutes a day to exercising, even skipping deserts. Ifyou don’t want to be late from work, you have to start going to bed earlier tocomplete that six hours of sleep. And if you want to attract the right partnerfor you, you have to accept your own short comings and start working on whereto improve yourself to become the type your ideal partner would likely getattracted to. The things we practice become habits and in time these defines whowe are.

Learn from our past.

Cherish the present.

Look forward to the future.

It takes 21 days of repeating anactivity to make it a habit. Whether you’ll b be giving 30 minutes of your time toreading, switching from chocolates to fruits for your desert, or waking up 6 amevery morning, making the right choices (no matter how simple they may be) andacting upon these will turn your life from where you are now to somewhere better.

Never neglect the simple things youdo in life!

Photo taken by M. Halili

What Success Is...

2011-10-28T09:13:00.000-07:00

Define SUCCESS...

It may be getting a promotion

Being able to travel more

Or finally getting fame…and fortune…

Then again, for some, fortune is enough….

Let’s admit, almost everyonedefines and acknowledges success tothe amount they have stashed away in the bank. With money you can buy anythingyou want, go anywhere you want, and even be your own boss. Other than this youcan even help every person who comes to you for it and provide for your family’sneeds and wants…. When you’re able to do this you end up happy because you’re “successful”…But what if no matter how much work you do—even with the six figure salary youget each month—you still find yourself unsuccessful…

You find that the money you earn isn’t still enough foryour family

You don’t get to achieve what should have been a fast andgrowing business.

And you’re completely stressed out…

So what’s wrong with this picture?

The BEST THINGS IN LIFE ARE FREE…

You’d be surprised by how this era’s best marketingexperts and richest men defined success and even formulated a way to attain it.

Come to think of it, all of us already have an idea ofwhat SUCCESS really is.

It is winning that basketball game you and your teampracticed hard for….

It is passing that licensure exam after burning themidnight candle for months…

It is finally finishing that novel you’ve been planningand writing for a year…

To sum all of these we can therefore say that success is finding fulfillment in whatyou do best.

International internet marketing consultant StephenPierce once said “Money is not the cause. It’s the effect…It’s your way ofthinking that causes all your good fortune in life….”

In other words:

If you want something you have to fill it with love andhappiness…

Being happy and appreciative of what you have inspires youto achieve a certain goal…

You love it therefore working on it is enjoyable…

When you enjoy doing it you are also motivated to learnmore about it…

Learning means growth…

You gain the tools needed to further push you in makingyour dream a reality…

When you’re successful you’re fulfilled not because you’reearning more money

Money isjust a bonus….

It is because at the end of the day you realized you’vealready made a difference….

Thebest things in life are indeed free….

Icould go on with this post but I think I’ve already said what’s necessary. Andto end this well here’s something from one of the most influential andsuccessful man history has ever known…

Steve Jobs (1955 - 2011)

Image from IDEAS INSPIRING INNOVATION

When Things Go Out of Control...

2011-10-16T04:44:00.000-07:00

Listen....

I was supposed to write something aboutiphone app development but I ended up writing this blog post instead. Recentlya certain blogger’s awards event happened in Legazpi. I may not have been apart of it but some friends were and they won (CONGRATULATIONS!!!). I’m happyfor them and I have no regrets if I haven’t posted my link (this blog post) earlierfor the possibility of it being nominated. I was still fixing this blog – fromthe contents to its layout (and layout’s next). As a graduate of an IT courseand as the blog’s owner I felt it was but right that I do the tweaking myself.Unfortunately I wasn’t able to do it for months. But enough about this blog (orwhen would it get finally done); I just want to point out something….

Things are meant to happen for a reason…

I may not have had the opportunity tobe part of it but someone else did and it was because I added him (aspontaneous decision) to the blogger group (and I even posted his link) ….I didn’tadd mine I added his…and I have no regrets…and he won…and I’m happy for him…andI felt extremely excited about this realization that I should have seen evenbefore….

Friends your life, my life, everybody’slife, is already made…

Life is a blueprint and we are but the laborers who need to make sure it’sfoundation don’t falter.

When I found out that my friend won theawards I suddenly felt that sort of exciting-unexplainable feeling forrealizing that something weird but good was going on! It was that fact thatalthough we weren’t planning on it, there are things which just happen that areout of our control—SOMEONE ELSE is.

Even before the said awards event, Iwas already having moments where I would have this feeling: when all you can dois let go and just go with wherever the situation would take you.It wasn't coincidence that I added him up and gave his link; and thatthere was a blogger awards. It wasn’t even chance. It was all fate…it was hisfor the taking…and I’m happy I was used by SOMEONE as an instrument to deliverit to my friend what is definitely his.

After what had happened I am hopefulGOD will give me what I want and what my heart had prayed for. Weeks before thesaid blogger awards, I was in Legazpi for another important event. On that dayI was wearing what I thought was a fitting choice of clothes for a hot weather—awhite and airy top; who would have thought that the color I was wearing wasactually a requirement that event. I was not aware nor told of what to bring orwhat to wear for that day. But when I came it was as if everything I needed washanded down to me. I didn’t bring with me an envelope which was also arequirement (as I’ve said I didn’t know). It was a blessing that someone – astranger – was there who rose to his feet and told me to just wait for him. Helater came back and handed me the envelope needed. A lot of things thathappened that day were what I can say “out of my control”. SOMEONE ELSE, asI’ve said, was.

After learning of my friend’s winning,I am confident everything I prayed for my life and for my family will fall intoplace. I have gone a long way and this is all because HE made it possible.

Things happen for a reason. Pieces fall into place for a bigger picture. Whether you’d be directly involved in it or just a tool for it to be completed,you are still part of it and that’s a blessing. At present I am happy andexcited for this new found and felt awareness.

While I wait for the outcome of myventure weeks ago (before this post) in Legazpi, another idea came into mind.As I work my way to it, I recently discovered a certain event that led me torealize I was on the right track.

With God nothing is impossible. We justhave to have faith that all will be well. And as I fix my blog (this blog) I amalso reviewing to prepare for my next adventure.

I know God will make it possible for meto have it. After all HE did not only gave me limits from zero to infinite buthas also made sure “success” was part of my blueprint.

Photo taken by M. Halili 

Edited by Jenny G. Jimenez

Morning Walk

2011-05-03T15:02:00.000-07:00

The already risen sun

I love my early morning walks; although I haven't done much of it recently, I’ll definitely do it again! When I started doing it I was only limited to our yard, but with the terrain I can't help worrying about tripping over--in other words I DON'T ENJOY IT! Good thing my sister finally took me to the pier to do some walks.

Tae-bo session

Sorsogon Baywalk (the pier) was the perfect place to do my walking exercises. Other than the gentle breeze there was another reason why I wanted to do my walks at the pier: to catch the sunrise. After someone at the office told me of the beautiful morning we had (I was assigned to the evening shift back then)—the pink reddish sunrise—I wanted to see it again. Unfortunately, I haven’t seen that same sunrise again; and I'm missing it. To be honest I haven't seen sunrises as pretty as that—it was just so amazing; as if someone had painted it especially for me. But I guess it's going to be a while before I’ll see it again....

I wasn't able to see the sunrise that morning when we had our walk. The sun was already up. Instead I was surprised to see many people with jogging pants and rubber shoes on. There was a group of women having their tae-bo session while their husbands jogged back and forth; another group was doing some boxing exercises. I was completely overwhelmed by the number of people present that morning compared to the usual time I spend there with my friends (which was after working hours). It seems mornings at the pier were busier compared to its afternoons (and I never thought there are a lot of health conscious people in Sorsogon). With the number of people present that morning, and for a girl with crutches wearing jogging pants and rubber shoes, that morning became a challenge.

Where's Jenny?

I was completely aware that there would be lots of eyes wandering on my direction – and it did. As I took my walking I saw glances coming my way, checking me out; I was even asked by those whom I cross paths with if I was okay or if I needed any help at all (my sister jogged to the docks). I told them I was fine and that I can manage; smiled to them and continued my walk. I never really liked grabbing much attention and I know I should have gotten used to it by now. What the heck! I was there, the stares were normal (since a girl with crutches doing her walking exercise at the pier, on her own, was something new to most people there), and I need my walk.

I had a few turns before my sister and I headed to light candles at the cathedral. It was a day to be grateful -- I have surpassed another challenge and I had a great time. I may not have caught the sunrise but just like the pink reddish sky my officemate-slash-friend shared with me during one of our last mornings at the office (we were both resigning) I felt a new and beautiful sunrise come up inside me....

Oh...I was wearing a pink tee and red jogging pants too...haha *wink*

Photos by Jenny and Jeremy Gonzales Jimenez  

I've been to Pidru's

2011-02-27T07:49:00.000-08:00

It's not Juan, nor Santiago nor Jose - not even Pedro - who had recently captured my interest (although these are names of the four Jimenez brothers whom my family call ancestors)...and it's not even a guy....it's dining...

My sister Jemai and a serving of tapsilog

I've been gone from Sorsogon City for more than a year and now that I'm back a lot of things have changed. Some of these are the establishment; I never thought I'd see a classy club, a billiards joint (with a comfy look), and coffee shops here in Sorsogon City. Previous years have convinced me that there are simply changes, no matter how good they are, that some Sorsoganons are not accepting. However my dad was right; it's easier to adjust to changes from something rural to one that’s more urban (like Sorsogon City)—it was harder getting used to living from urban to rural (like me). It may have taken me a while to become adept to how things go here in the province (since my move from Manila), yet even as I have gotten used to it God knows how much I wished most people here can start seeing things differently—appreciate changes and do things without worrying about prejudices nor become one for others.

Legazpi somehow satiated my thirst for the urban and now that I'm back here in Sorsogon (and also things about me that I lost and missed most) I find me visiting Pidru's

Pidru's is that cute resto just behind Goodshot Billiards (another place I wish to take pictures). I went there first with my sister and I never thought that I'd go back. It was a homey place with all the trinkets and ornates made from natural products like coconut husks and shells. It was a good comeback for me in Sorsogon, especially as I saw a place where I see myself with my nose on a book while enjoying brewed coffee.

I love the place: it is clean, artistic and the food's great! The best part in dining here is it costs less compared to other restos with the same ambiance and serving (trust me you'll feel full after a helpful serving at Pidrus without spending more than a hundred pesos).

Here are some of the photos I took at Pidru's using Justin's (my brother) cell phone... (my take at photography...*wink*)

Capiz Ornate

Handicrafted bags for sale at Pidrus

Capiz window shutters to a wall decor
(one of my favorites)

A cup of my brew (kapeng barako)

Shells by the window

Capiz window decor

photos by Jenny, Jeremy and Justin Gonzales Jimenez

Wishing I can update this blog more....

2011-02-27T05:57:00.000-08:00

I know I haven't updated my blog for a month and how I wish I could more. Anyways, here's an update of what's been going on with me lately..

I've been attending class (it's not raining anymore)

I've gone to Legazpi (since my last December 28 visit)

I've gone back to Pidru's Resto (and discovered how full and good and cheap their carbonara is)

and attended a seminar The Art of teaching (and wrote something about it).

I can't say I've been really loaded but compared to the previous years, let's admit that at this point I should have at least that tiny bit of time to update my post--so why didn't I...?

I can't decide what to write....

I do work...I go to school...and I have gone to places and done things that I wish to blog them all.

I love writing and I want to write more yet there are also times when I have written too many words and can't decide what adjective to use in my write ups (hehe).

So here I am apologizing and I know most of you might be thinking "why didn't she just use this post to write whatever she should be writing right now?" well as I've said I can't decide.

I still have lots to do (exciting and new things to do) but for now, so as not to waste (not that I think this is a waste) me writing this...the following blog (and hopefully another) will be on what I recently did.

Happy reading... *big smile*

Blogging and My Thoughts

2011-01-27T09:09:00.000-08:00

Finally....Finally....Finally....

After more than a month....Finally!!!!

I miss BLOGGING! It's been a while and I really really miss this. It's been a while and in that span of time a lot has happened (even if it means me just staying home).

Although I wasn't writing, I was still visiting my blog. Unfortunately, in as much as I wanted to write whatever I was experiencing, work and school was always getting in the way. Not that those can stop me, it was just that I don't want to break the momentum I had with work and I have always considered this blog as a leisure. I love writing and this is a proof of it. I wanted to become a writer when I was young...Be like Ate Ophie and have my short stories or poems published in a Women's Magazine. At present, I am a writer, but not the type of writer I was planning on...but I must admit this "occupation" has definitely made me a better writer.

This blog is a proof that I still am holding to that dream (along with the many others I have). I am a girl who wishes to be many things and I did become that girl (although stress took over). In time I know I can have that dream of having a book published (my novel) and at the same time enjoy being an artist (in the field or writing and hopefully photography), and practice my profession as an engineer. For now all I can do is write this blog entry to ensure my readers (if I have any) that I'm still breathing....

Expect many changes this year! This girl had a great 2010 and claims 2011 to be better. There will be more hardships yet I do not wish to dwell on those but rather enjoy what I have at present. I may be lacking sleep too due to work and school but I'll still find that time to at least enjoy a meal out even by myself. Who says I need to have a date to enjoy good food? Hopefully I'll be blogging about them as well (especially my visit at Pidru's) and hopefully that plan to have a new cell phone (after loosing my last one) would push through this year (that would mean more pictures since I intend to have one with a cam). Other than this blog I'll be putting up two other blogs which would feature my novel and of course poems.

Before I end this blog post, I would like to thank those who continue to support me: firstly my family who constantly remind me to sleep and prepare for school (Mama Thank You for walking with me whenever I'd go out of the house), secondly my relatives (especially Papa Ace for being a second dad and always being there for me no matter what/ Mama Merce and Mama Ding who constantly remind me through emails to hold on to my faith and to align my work and my thoughts to God/ Ate Ophie for inspiring me to be a writer), thirdly my college instructors (I do not wish to mention names since each one gave a contribution to what I am now), fourthly my friends (from Manila to Legazpi to Sorsogon) thank you for raising me up and being there always and lastly (and most especially) to God for making me a part of these people's (I've mentioned) lives (and them to mine).

I still have places to go, people to meet, and things to do; and before I move on and write more, I have to get back to work and later to my studies....I still have a reporting this Saturday morning! *smiley*

My Free Time, Schooling, and Dreams...

2010-12-07T21:49:00.000-08:00

People ask : Where have you been?

I answered : Working....

They ask again : Where...and what did you do....?

I replied : I became a writer and I taught college (math and logic circuits)...

Then they say (nodding) : Ah!

I get a lot of these lately: the nods, the questions, and of course the are-you-sure looks (as if I am not so sure of what I'm saying). It's been a while since I last entered the steps of my Alma Matter, and honestly--in as much as I am pleased to be back--I can't help but question other people's sincerity when they talk to me, or see me, walking along the corridors (and the surprise looks whenever I'd climb the stairs).

People here knew I grew up protected that there are those in this school that do still give me the same attention as before. I am happy to see them again and assure them that their princess-Jenny-flower-simon (as Bro. Noel would call me back in college) is all "grown up"...

Grown up?

I can now go up the second floor on my own...

I can go around the city on my own...

I can visit Legazpi on my own....

and I can absolute go fight with someone (go mad and fuming if needed) without hesitation when it comes to defending friends....

Yup! I am not the same girl as I was before....

The reason why I came back was to continue what I started....

After my mom's death, I, the girl who walked with crutches and who was not working, decided to take up methods of teaching after the new dean of the college department said it was a must for those who wish to be teachers. I was supposed to take up Masters but ACI got held up that year with it; so I went on with the Methods instead.

I spent a year taking up units in Methods of Teaching under the BEED curriculum (and additional units in Business Management and Organization which I'm glad I did take). Taking it was a challenge knowing that a certain issue was whirling around (involving me and a certain decision made that year which I do not wish to say on this page). After that school year, I stopped with only three units remaining to complete the 18 units required by the PRC (to take Licensure Exam for Teachers); I got myself a job at SLTCFI. It required me to stay in Legazpi which I'm glad I did...

The stay was great! I get to see myself glow and grow! I began to feel that confidence I lost after that certain "issue" occurred. And now after more than a year, I'm finally back for schooling. I had to rest from teaching for a while to focus on finishing my methods and at the same time take up my masters.

After more than a year being too busy to even go out with friends, I finally had that much precious time to sit back and relax. I may still be busy but at this point I finally came to that stage where I know what I want and slowly I come to realize my dreams. I want something and at present I've achieved a goal. Now I have another goal I wish to achieve--another step towards making my dreams come true..

I am happy -- though not as everybody, and even I, would wish for myself. I also come to realize how much I have missed being "me" and how much I am seeking for something....I just wish next year would be different...I wish next year would be better for me as I slowly grow more.....

photo from Alya Rodriguez

My Winning Piece: Never Fails To Give Me A WARM Smile!!!

2010-12-01T23:58:00.000-08:00

Be the Change...

Last May 2009, I got call from a company that I sent an application too. Actually this company was the first I applied to without any back-up person/s within its premise (and imagine I got a call from them). It was as if DESTINY had really planned for me to be there....

SLTCFI (Southern Luzon Technological College Foundation Inc.) was my first employer (an employer without any uncles or aunties or godparents or family friends to back me up). Luck was with me that time when I first came to respond to their call--I have no idea as to what position I was going to apply for except for the idea that they were in need of a Computer Engineer (according to a friend). They then gave me these choices: to be a web developer, an SEO (Search Engine Optimizer), an Instructor, or a Writer. I wanted to become a web developer, however I was just starting out with my HTML (Java and PHP was impossible for me to learn in just a short time). I wasn't familiar back then with SEO, and I wish to be an instructor, but the head of the HR department was not there that time. Luckily the assessment for the writing position was ongoing when I came that day that after a few minutes of sitting and being interviewed at the HR office I found myself writing a sample article (assessment for the writing position). I passed that day...

Then came the training and the teaching demo (days later) which I passed! I was already expecting to get my first assignment for teaching that semester and was ready to give up on the writer position until came the last day with Ms. Abby and Ms. Tabby (the trainers).

Below is the piece that gave me the job which I love and enjoy. I may not be in SLBPO anymore yet the memories of friends, the skills I've learned, and the life I had at night time (I was in night shift) was something that I will always be thankful for. I was once a girl with crutches who thought there was no hope to be noticed and was forever bounded by my disability. The next thing after SLBPO is what pushed me to go forward with my masters and complete my methods of teaching: they took me as a part time instructor in SLTCFI--a positioned I passed a year ago (yes! I taught college, went up and down staircases, and I survived and loved the job--something someone thought of as impossible for me to accomplish). I will forever be grateful to SL, especially those who saw beyond the differently-abled girl. They gave me the start I needed to boost me up into action....THANK YOU!!!

********************************

Feeling the warmth

It’s been more than a decade since our family decided to live in Bicol. To be specific, the year was 1998—I was a sophomore in high school and the move was frustrating—frustrating in the sense that at that time, back in my old alma matter, things were looking up for me: Class was great, friends were good, and I had just been accepted in the school publication. I had no idea what awaits me…never thought that the frustrating move could be so much better.

There are no better words to describe Bicol than the warmth of its people. Filipinos may be known for it, but it seems moving here made me really understand its meaning. From the way they speak to their movements, it seems that their simple ways gives that inviting feel that keeps me going back to that place.

Since the move, I had gained more friends—more so than before—and had excelled far more than I had hoped for. And even though I’ve experienced more rains than sunny days, for me there is nothing warmer than Bicol…

Memory From The Past: Reposting Of My Last Article From My Aemilian Column UNSHACKLED

2010-12-01T19:28:00.000-08:00

July 2010: Me and my friend Erika werein the DJ’s booth waiting to go on air. As we did this we chatted in betweentips on entertaining our listeners’ messages and modulating voice. To help mecalm my nerves (I was a newbie on the booth), our topic shifted to my writingjob, our days as school paper staffer, and that one article she read back incollege that she liked very much…

She described how “personal” thearticle’s approach was that she remembered the message it implied. During thattime she was attending a seminar in our school, and each of them were given a copyof our school paper. She asked me of course and I asked her back about the yearwhen she got it; but all she mentioned was how the article was started – with TheLittle Mermaid’s song: PART OF THAT WORLD.

At the mention of the song the realizationcame. Of course I became doubtful at first; it’s been years since I graduatedin college. But as the conversation went on, and as she told me more about thecontent, I became surer as to who wrote it—me…

Disney's The Little Mermaid

Erika forgot who wrote the article butshe didn’t forget its message. For me that was one of the best compliments Igot…

Here’s the article I published in TheAemilian, the official student publication of Aemilianum College Inc.; my finalpost for my column Unshackled(published March 2006)

Unshackled Voice

PART OF THAT WORLD

By: Jenny Gonzales Jimenez

“…Up where they walk,
Up where they run,
Up, where they stay all day in the sun,
Wander and free,
Wish I could be,
Part of that world…”

Little Mermaid Ariel knew what she wanted—what’s deep inside her, in other words, she knew herself…. I’ve always loved her story: a girl who’s amazed of what the world above the waters, beyond the shores, has—the life she could never have under the sea. Vibrant living lass whose wish is to be part of that world where she could express herself more freely….

A pen. A paper. A hand. A mind. A belief…. The weapons of an artistic mind in pursuit of a desired goal—To express freedom, freedom from all mediocrity and sarcasm.

The 6^th Regional Tertiary Schools Press Conference was held last November 23 to 25 (year 2005) in Bethlehem Retreat House, Bacacay, Albay. It was a gathering of expressionists—young journalists opt to the challenge of showcasing their trade in delivering truth. I had my share of Press Cons before, during my third year in high school. It was held in Gubat at that time. Although I only stayed there for two days including the awarding, not to mention even if I didn’t win anything, still it was worth it—the memories of that event lasted. From the day I came there to find one of my co-member with a sore eyes, the birthday celebration of another co-member which we celebrated by placing a birthday candle on a cupcake, and of course, my favorite, when they raced for the fishball vendor which we’ve all been waiting for to pass by.

Those were the days when, I have to admit, I loved writing more than now; when ideas ran through my head with such fluidity, constantly running through my veins onto my hand, into the paper as I write away. It’s been a long time…. I’ve missed this feeling. I felt like I’ve just returned from a vacation in the Bermuda Triangle which I entered being sucked out of the world I live in entering a tropic with Aliens wearing bathing suits and holding surf boards (some lousy feeling huh)—I was in my own bubble, a void.

Writing has been that big part of my life no one, definitely, no one can take away from me. It was my way of expressing my individuality—what’s inside my most inner core—deep, unmoved, unbounded. It was me. And I missed me.
I know I haven’t stopped writing, but then again, that was just writing for the sake of it, not writing because you want to be heard. I have been so paranoid by what other people was to say about me that I forgot how to be me. I have friends that are open-minded, that no matter how different we were we still connected but how about the rest. I was too much bothered in the sense that I don’t want them to think of anything bad about me -- I forgot that I shouldn’t care less, as long as those whom I hold close dear understood me. They were my life, my strength, yet how could I care about those with narrow beliefs?

The press con awakened me. Being able to experience it again has somehow opened my mind to the truth that true people are those who are not afraid to express their individuality. I am me, you are you, and they were they. I felt free….That was one experience I know no one can take away from me, that even though I never made it for Luzonwide, just to be there was worth it. I enjoyed every part of it—though the whole competition was a sure-fire-hit-nerve-wrecking fact.

From the moment I came that morning at the van station till I was dropped off at my uncle’s place was well recorded. I missed it, and I will miss it even more once I step out to that world of great providence, the world usually faced by graduates. I will never get to experience it again. That long wait for your turn to compete, the heart-attacks I imagined I was going to have then and there, the continuous annoyance I gave my co-members due to my nervousness ( I hoped I never annoyed them much), and of course the bell which signals food is being served “come and get it!”(hehehe). But God knows, what I really will miss most is the people, especially my co-aemilians: those times we would hang out in our rooms and talk, talk, and talk; share ideas and experiences; learn about each other more than what we already know. I will never forget even a single second spent with them. Even the friends we met (like Jho and of course that guy next door…ehem!!!). Those were priceless times: when I slowly found myself—one step at a time. How I wish I could do it once again….

Cheers to friendship, to memories and to life...

Walking Home

2010-12-01T13:52:00.000-08:00

*this is something I wrote earlier thisevening as I came back from school....

I am, at last, home only to find myself waitingoutside our house for the rest of my family to arrive...

I came home pretty late today...

Earlier in Aemilianum, as my instructor called theassigned reporter to start (class started at 3pm), my sister sent me a textmessage informing me of the traffic building up at downtown. People havegathered in the streets to watch the street dance – a part of the SosogonFestivities.

My class was only until 4pm. Since Prof. Ed. 9 is my only class duringweekdays, I usually come in fifteen minutes before class and leave immediatelyafter it. Today, however, due to the parade, I had to stay another hour inschool, hoping that by then traffic would be back to normal.

The "hour more" was spent wiselyconversing with Ms. Pacla regarding the novel I was working on (another storyto tell) and spending time with my dear girls from Jardin. By past 5 pm Istarted out the doors of Aemilianum and luckily got a tricycle ride with thedriver suggesting to bring me straight to my destination instead of going todowntown for the second ride home (downtown's traffic seems to be slow due tothe parade and the rain--which happened during that hour of wait i did).

I spent that hour wisely. I had a chance to talk withMs. Pacla regarding the novel I was working on; and also bond with my girlsfrom Jardin de Maria. By past 5pm I started to walk out the doors of my almamatter and got lucky to get a tricycle ride which offered to bring me straightto my destination (traffic was still slow at downtown).

The tricycle stopped at the end of the pavedroad. From there I started walking my way towards home. I call it adventure.

There were more houses on the way compared towhen we first came here; just imagine how it was further ahead…where we builtour house. I finally came at the turnwhere the gate to our compound is. This is the part where I needed to be extracareful, not because it was rocky but because of the grass. They’ve alreadygrown after a month since they were last trimmed. But even then I still praythat no snake would jump at me from nowhere. There were only a few steps andour unfinished second floor was already within sight.

Between being careful with my steps, praying thatI won’t trip, and sweat forming on my forehead, the realization that no one mightbe home yet hit me. We all did go out at the same time and surely traffic isn’tgoing any faster in downtown. I don’t have the key to the door and there’s noway I was going to walk back all that way especially since I just passed by thearea where they once found a snake. So I still went on. Just then a certainscent filled the atmosphere.

I knew that scent well.

My mom’s perfume….

My mom was with me…

I know some may find it weird but I said hi. Ever since she died we always hadthis feeling that she’s with us especially when that scent came strong. None ofus used that perfume. As an Ilocano tradition we sent it with her – a pabaon.

The scent faded as soon as I entered our gate. Ifound the lights outside were on but (as expected) the windows closed.

Now I sit here…And between thoughts of wanting tobreak the doors, planning to have my own set of keys, and wishing I had broughtwith me a bottle of insect repellent, I write these lines:

   I miss my mom!
           I miss hereveryday.....
              and God is good.....
                  He allowed her to keep watch of us.....
    and He allowed us to have her as our

Mother.....

God's kindness was shining on us....

He gave me that warning from my sister so as tonot get tied up in that messy traffic...

He gave me that extra time to talk to friends tomake my dream a reality...

And there was my mom...

Now my thoughts wandered off to my laptop insideand my need to type what I just wrote in this scratch paper. But just likeTIME, CHANCES, and SERENDIPITY, all I can do is wait and hope that the next footstepsI hear (the sound coming louder) are those of my loved ones with the key to thedoor.....

Photoby Gil Sages

First Attempt: For the Love of Haiku...

2010-11-26T21:07:00.000-08:00

It started with a comment...then came the suggestion...

This is my first attempt for a haiku not to mention in Japanese Calligraphy. Thanks to the Midnight Writer and Sir Ben I found another interest to study (and I hope there will be a follow-up with this one) -- and a good tattoo design I wish to have (but take note in Henna since I can't imagine myself growing old with ink on my skin hehe). Comments and suggestions are welcome and are very much appreciated. I do hope I did good here (although this is not the traditional one). But in case there are indeed some correction then I'll gladly revise this one (and once I get to figure out how to write it in traditional jap calligraphy)...hehe...

猫は 9つの命を持つ...
cats having nine lives...
好奇心...
curiosity...
リスクを取って...
taking risk...
とチャンスを取って相次いを与えられている...
taking chances and being given one after another...
学習...
learning...
失って...
losing...
優勝...
winning...
信仰...
faith...
声に出して考えて...
thinking out loud...
可能性を考えて...
thinking of the possibilities...
モノづくりが起こる...
making things happen
類似...
analogies...
すごい！（ちょうどアイデア）
wow! (just ideas)

*I would like to thank Google Translate for the help after being confused (this is my first to deal with Jap calligraphy) with translating….

Finding ME Again....

2010-11-26T20:12:00.000-08:00

I missed me....and I'm starting to come back...

the past few weeks were somewhat enlightening. It seems as if time was revealing something that was already there right in front of me (actually instead of "revealing" I was thinking more of "slapping")--the answers to my long asked question. Time is indeed an ally....

I've finally decided to move on--from all the frustrations that made me lose confidence in myself. For years I've become somewhat a stranger to myself. It is only recently that I realized how I became a totally different person than who I was back then. It was true that pretending too much that you are someone (which I did to fit in the place I was in and please someone) will really make you that type of person ('till now--I realized how much I have degraded myself in the process). I needed to go back to who I was to correct my mistakes and to fully grow. It may take some time but at present all I can do is make a step.

sadness was filling me up all these years. Maybe that was the reason why I never had any suitors (at least sane ones). I always ended up attracting the wrong sorts of guys (I mean those who thought they can get the chance to prove their manhood through having "dinner and breakfast"--the "and" part was what I was worried about).

My brother (Jay) was right--if I want to catch the guy (with the qualities I was praying for), then I better start by making myself the girl that would equal him... God will give me someone perfect for me and in time He will...but I have to do my part and not just pray...

I was lonely though never alone but honestly changing my self back and better than before wasn't due to me not having that "someone"... It's all about loving myself. I realized that by being happy and loving me more then I may attract a lot of great things in life.

I need to move on from being broken...

...move on from being a kid...

Everything does happen for a reason...and this one is for me to learn that God made each of us special--and we should be grateful about it...

A Memory...Time...Acceptance and Letting Go... (part II)

2010-10-22T12:11:00.000-07:00

Heal was the first...many followed....

Wanting to Get Over

I feel you...even if you're not there
and even you're with someone else
I still feel you loving me

I see you, in the corners of this lonely room
even though there's nothing here but gloom
hoping that someday you'll fill it too

refrain:

Would I be happy, if you decided to stay?
Should I feel sorry, for loving you this way?

chorus:

my eyes are dry from crying all those tears,
feeling sorry for the love I felt all these years,
but i have to let go
knowing you're heart's here no more
wanting to get over you
is the hardest thing to do.

In your arms, I felt magic of a love so strong
now there's nothing left for me to do
but to move on and face the truth

And it's hard, to mend pieces of a broken heart
but I know I'm gonna make it through
knowing I'm giving my best to forget you

refrain 2
Should I feel wiser, knowing I've done what's right?
Should I feel stronger, now that I'm saying goodbye?

chorus:

my eyes are dry from crying all those tears,
feeling sorry for the love I felt all these years,
but i have to let go
knowing you're heart's here no more
wanting to get over you
is the hardest thing to do.

A Memory...Time...Acceptance and Letting Go...

2010-10-22T10:49:00.000-07:00

It's been a while....

I've been trying write something for this blog but the words can't seem to get out. A lot of things had happened that one may consider somewhat exciting. I'm still writing (that's something no one can dare take away), been a DJ, had sleep, got out for fun, and taught college students for their Algebra: in other words I had loads of stuff to do that boredom was "getting bored" of waiting for his turn...

I was completely busy....

And I was completely not thinking about him...

I had other things to worry about....until this week...
In the middle of computing grades, fixing articles. helping a friend with her project in MIT, thinking about taking MIT next semester, and wishing to play Rohan with a friend, the thought came back....

It's been years...the way I feel may not be the same as before whenever I see his pictures, yet the memories--I may not be holding them or maybe I'm just cherishing them so much--remind me of how I was hurt.

Accepting was hard yet it reminds us of how love should be given...UNSELFISHLY...Love is wise after all. Man was the only one foolish. He was my darkness and in time he let me shine bright--he made me light and he made me see another light from a distance (hope)....

For a memory that I love...
For the time that taught me well...
and for accepting the fact that at times the only way to say you love a person is by letting go....

Below is a song I composed with my sister. I was in my last year of college then and in the middle of making the project documentation for a digital scoreboard, I ended up writing this. It became famous among the high school students of ACI when my sister sang it on stage. She was in her third year of high school when she gave the melody. Up 'til now her classmates know the song's chorus....this is HEAL...

Heal

I
In every place I see your face smiling at me
I hear your voice sing with the wind calming my every chill
It's late at night and I feel sorry
for myself 'cause I know you're not here....

********
Now I look at the sky
wishing and hoping that somehow you'd come my way again
'Cause I just can't deny how much I love you
How I want you to stay
******

II
For every touch as I quiver feeling all the love
The gladness that lingers deep sending me high up above
I'm here again
praying for what wasn't there

********
Now I look at the sky
wishing and hoping that somehow you'd come my way again
'Cause I just can't deny how much I love you
How I want you to stay
******

How many sad songs must I hear to realize that you're not for me?
How may times do I have to face everyday without you near?

********
Now I look at the sky
wishing and hoping that somehow you'd come my way again
'Cause I just can't deny how much I love you
How I want you to stay
******

'Cause I'm here now
here without you
holing on to my faith
that my heart would heal someday....

This was the first of many songs....and its been a while 'till I was able to make again....

yup, it has been a while....

Waiting...

2010-05-05T12:36:00.000-07:00

I saw this poem while checking out "My Sassy Girl", the Korean version, in the internet. Reading it somehow reminded me of how much we wait for something to come back, hoping that it would ease the pain we felt brought by the emptiness of them not being there. But what if it didn't come back? are you still willing to wait for it? 

God works in so many mysterious ways that what we somehow thought as we already know actually has more to unfold--at times they are just right under our noses, we're just too foolish looking afar rather than looking close by. 

Waiting for something to come back may sometimes fool us. we keep on waiting for something familiar rather than expecting the unexpected. Things change but as we accept things no matter how painful they may be it is then that we realize that what what we waited for did come back only in a new form. cheers to happiness...

I'm waiting for the sky
to be blue again
I'm waiting for the smile
to come back again

Sometimes things are not
the way you planned
Sometimes they go wrong,
sometimes you can't stand...

The voice of the wind
tells me it is within
The roar of the air
gives me strength in despair

Oh, the sound of the trees
can make you fly off your feet
But the sound of silence
can make you see...

An angel of hope, can you see again?
The journey of life, can you live again?
A city of glory, can you feel again?
It's the spirit of love, can you love again?

one step at a time

2010-04-08T04:11:00.000-07:00

I really have no idea as to how I'll deal with the future. I've noticed that whenever I make plans for it, it usually ends up not as what I want. Organizing things at times seem to have been a waste of my time and effort especially when some sudden changes are needed to be made to cope up with the present situation--unexpected situations....

I will be living on my own next week and I honestly feel ambivalent about it. Firstly It's my first time, secondly I'll miss my dad, thirdly he'll be able to see more of the farm (someone's doing something fishy that production seemed to have been meddled wrongly), and lastly it's the mark that I am an adult (we'll I am however I grew up very well protected).

The last time I saw Clarissa I saw the worry on her face when I told her I have to climb the stairs to the third floor for my work. another worry factor was when I added the fact that I'll be moving and living in Legazpi on my own. My friends are not used to leaving me on my own. Out side my home they are my family's extension; they've protected me through and through.

I have plans but I've learned to expect the unexpected. Things don't usually come up the way we wished them to be. At first we may take the worst of it but at the long run we learn to accept it and see the beauty blossoming.

(sigh) I am worried and excited... and I know I can survive it. God is my light and His staff is my forstress...

Here's a toast to new beginnings and a new adventure....

Cheers....

Taking Chances

2010-03-12T17:44:00.000-08:00

there are times that we have to let go of something in order to gain more. it may hurt us in the process yet these are opportunities for us to grow and be the best person that we can be. moving forward may mean trekking the unknown but how will we find out the things ahead if we are not going to venture on? life may be unpredictable and chances are things may happen differently than what we wanted--then again things happen for a reason. it may be tough at times but lessons are learned more. Bravery is one trait measured by how we face reality yet hold on to our dreams.

taking chances at times are what's best...taking chances to love, to grow, and to tread the waters and see how vast the ocean is.....

actually i'm just gonna share a song by Celine Dion. A toast to moving on and taking chances....

TWILIGHT SAGA: ECLIPSE FULL TRAILER

2010-03-12T05:34:00.000-08:00

Finally, after more than 24 hours in waiting it's fully released! here's the first full trailer to Twilight Saga's "Eclipse". check it out!!! (can't wait to see the film)

Teaser Trailer to TWILIGHT SAGA: ECLIPSE

2010-03-10T17:55:00.000-08:00

It's a good day and hopefully tomorrow will be better.

I started my evening (@ work) smiling but definitely not in the mood to write. I was thinking too much on stuff that concerns me, my family, and me again (not that I'm self centered or anything--just worried). I was feeling lousy 'till I saw something--a light in the darkness.

Today, March 10, 2010 the 10-second teaser to the trailer of the third Twilight installment "Eclipse" is out! ha! the full trailer will premier tomorrow....

A toast to better days ahead (I know this is so shallow but I just can't help it--GO ROBSTEN!)

Here's the said teaser...

@ Ate Ofie: better not miss this! Love you mwah!!!!!

Understanding my brother's vanity

2010-03-09T02:31:00.000-08:00

Understanding my brother’s vanity can sometimes be hilarious.

Firstly I am the eldest and therefore should be the role model.
Secondly I am the girl and therefore should be very conscious of my looks.
Thirdly I am the one with work and should therefore be more capable of buying and trying out products (I think it is but normal at my age not to mention).

So it was funny (and weird) enough for me to find a milk mask solution together with the lotion at our place in Sorsogon. At first I was thinking it was my sister's, but when I asked her she told me it was Jay's. Knowing how vain my brother was hearing this was not surprising at all (however I can't help myself but laugh that he had to go this far).

I was completely use to the fact that he's vanity kit is more packed with beautifying solutions from facial soaps to lotions to moisturizers to facial scrubs; take note they are more branded than mine. The milk mask was something new to me.

After learning that it was jay's, I tried it (ignorance can make a fool out of man and I don't want to be that fool). Feeding my curiosity I read the instructions and did what was stated. If there was something to describe the experience it was that it felt like I was placing PVA glue on my face. Doing this in front of the mirror was like watching "Art Attack".

So there I did it and I have to let it sit on my face for 10 to 20 minutes. While waiting the replay of American Idol was on so I just sat on the couch and watched the "dark horse" did that amazing belting (while I feel like a dork for putting that mask on).

After 10 minutes (I don't want to push on for 20).....

I returned to in front of the mirror and started peeling the mask off. Again if there was one thing to describe the feeling it was like removing a disguise those done in "Mission Impossible". After pasting--err--placing the gooey stuff on my face peeling it off was fun. After my face was cleared of it I must admit it was smoother.

Conclusions:
1.The product was effective.
2. The whole experience made me think of myself as someone crazy.
3. My brother is definitely vainer than I thought he was.
4. Good thing I never have much breakout on my face to need the milk mask--for that was the first and last.

On being alone

2010-03-04T08:08:00.000-08:00

I have no idea as to how long can a magnet hold on to the metal except for the fact that the hands of time waits patiently for it to happen.

Just like friendship, there are times that the closest of buddies needs to part ways. There are times that we may feel different about it but this is how the story goes in real life. We connect and eventually we let go. It is sad to part ways especially if the heart is involved but it is during these times that we learn about practicality and how to face reality.

It is up to us how we'll hold on to dear faith knowing that there are things ahead which are far greater than those we let go; lessons are but part of them. It is normal to say that denial is but part of it and giving in will eventually follow--accepting it! It is part of growth and we can't deny ourselves that.

I guess the least we can all do is to move on....

Q and A

2010-03-04T02:03:00.000-08:00

There are things which we at times can't understand yet are meant to happen for a reason.

Lately, I must admit, going to work is looking forward to that one hour break where we have to turn off our computers and go to the pantry to have our Q and A sessions. It may have started just last week (or was it two weeks ago) but it is definitely one crazy ride. There are certain things that I have noticed and realized about whatever it is that's bothering me. For every conversation we make and as I listen to other people's questions were like having a background check result thrust at me without even asking it. And what benefits did I get?

It gave me the opportunity to know who they really were behind the jokes and the laughs.

The wisdom on things as I see it in their different point of views (a person need not experience things in order to learn).

The fact that I miss a lot of thing: firstly, when I was in manila and secondly, when I was in college

and lastly it's a secret....

it is surprising how people search for answers which are just right there in front of them waiting to be revealed. It made me think how people can be foolish at times to know the answers yet are just waiting to hear them from other people's mouths (guilty!). But I do admit lately when my spirit is down and there they were having snacks while exchanging ideas, it surges that hope that somehow those answers which I’ve always wanted to hear would come to me unexpectedly and everything would be ok.

Thanks to Didi Benami

2010-03-04T01:44:00.000-08:00

American Idol is that one reason why I want to go back to sorsogon more than ever recently and stay at home. Didi Benami was that waitress that captured my attention because of her electrifying performance in Hollywood week singing Terrified by Kara Dioguardi.

So she was this one girl whom I believe will definitely be someone people find as charming and interesting with the way she had sung all her song. Recently she gave me another love song to enjoy--"the way I am" by Ingrid Michaels. Totally lovable.

It’s a cute song that at present I can't stop playing...just take me the way I am baby.

Lyrics | Ingrid Michaelson Lyrics | The Way I Am Lyrics

Anne's Babe

2010-02-22T02:04:00.000-08:00

I wasn't really planning on it but I'm glad I did go.

Today is a great day and I hope it continuous for the whole week. Earlier this morning my laptop was totally infected with virus that I must say "thanks very bigtime" to Daddy (Vivencio) for saving it (although I can't say the same for my files....they're so wrecked). Another good news is that I got my black closed high heeled shoes all fixed and looking brand new. It's difficult for me to get new ones especially with the attention on details needed for my feet plus the fact that my sizes don't come available that easily.

Of all the great things that made my day was this one fact about life and about a friend that contributed to who I am presently....

Anne and her babe....

yup she is a M-O-M!

and I'm the next N-I-N-A-N-G (Godmother)!

We were on our way to drop Jemai (my sister) to the badmintton court after going to El Retiro. So as not to make things a bit hassle on our way we passed by the route where Anne lives. Papa did stop at the site of baby clothing hanged at the front of Anne's house. The next events were funny. A guy was at the gate when we came and I just opened the van's door to ask if she was there. The guy (whom i think is Anne's cousin), turned to call her out. Yup! the signal that she saw me came as she cried my name. Coming from an engineering background, where girls are also considered as "boys", our usual shouts for conversation seemed normal (although scandalous for many) but what made me see then was different than normal--it was special.

Anne, Kahren, Me and Roselle

She came out holding the baby looking as if we were still in college (and like she was just baby sitting LOL). Nothing has changed--between us that is. We have been apart for years yet it's as if she and I did not part for so long. It's as if we saw each other yesterday.

There I was, still riding inside the van, but aged in numbers and experiences--single and making through my career--while she was there standing in front of me outside the van's door holding her babe Kate. We did take different paths yet the friendship we started was there. She taught me to be frank, to not let anybody put me down (besides family). She was one of my best friends.

We may have been apart but it was then that I realize true friends stay with each other. Come to think of it she was a part of me--she added up to who I am now.

The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that
they grow separately without growing apart
- Elizabeth Foley
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Memories in the Cam

2010-02-15T01:19:00.000-08:00

I never thought I'd see these again.

Valentines was supposed to remind me I was still single and my only date was my pillow and the television (and if I have anything good book to read that would be an additional). Although I never complained as to how "single" I was (since I'm enjoying it), it would be nice to be able to celebrate it with someone (or someonesssssss...lol). Valentines Day was also Clarissa Cambel's birthday, the reason why Valentines was always exciting and not the boring day indoors kinda thing... Clarissa, Ann as we usually call her, is married and I'm pretty sure enjoying motherhood. I never got a chance to visit her and her family recently due to my schedule not to mention I'm not in Sorsogon most of the time. Yesterday however, as I check my sister's sling bags, I found the digicam instead. I turned it on...browsed the pictured....laughed...it was all still there..... The pics which we shot from the time when I graduated in college till my brother's birthday a year ago was all there. It was a like having a background check flashed on the cam's screen (hey check out the Jimenez kids and see how dorky they can be!!!). It was funny--and emotional. I saw my mom's picture and my grandma's too. Now they're both in heaven.

mama and mama pat

The pics were proof of how colorful life was and how different now is. Mama's here but I can't see her (so is Mama Pat), I don't know when I can get out of the house and have fun with only just me and my friends (recently my dad's been driving me around).

(Unfortunately incomplete) me and the gang two days after we graduated

picture taking after graduation with Fr. Frank and Ann's cousins

(from left to right) Jonee and Jennibeth (friend's since high school) me, sir dan, kahren, roselle, and ann

@ ARICA Hotel with drinking session with the gang (JUSTIN"S B-DAY)

more of the drinking session with my dad

It's amazing how technology has captured moments and even memories which at times are vivid. It was like doing a background screening of my cam--how much it has taken and how long was it when we last got hold of it. Oh well.... Valentines may be over but Clarissa has definitely aged another year (HAPPY BIRTHDAY Boi!). As for me I need to clear the memory card of the cam and keep the pics someplace else. After all these are reminders of loved ones, of those who loved us and continually do, and the fact that I was once upon a time slim and in dire need of dieting.

Peace and love,and a HAPPY VALENTINES!

Possibly...maybe...unexpectedly....

2009-11-24T04:51:00.000-08:00

things happen for a reason....

For the past few months I've been thinking of the possibilities that could happen in the future. Will I be still here in Legazpi next year? Will I see new progress with my career? and will I finally get that one thing that I believe is still missing in my life? Maybe yes...maybe no....maybe just maybe....

Anything is possible....

We can't say that what we presently see would give the outcome we are thinking about; things could turn differently the next day and we really don't know what hit us. We may find ourselves surprised with the outcome of our actions and wind up either lucky or simply (I don't believe in bad luck) something else. hmmmm.... I wonder....

Expect the unexpected........

When we just thought this could be it, it may leave you frustrated..better not expect too much. It may give the opposite honestly. The fact still remains that things do happen for a reason and that reason is not to shatter us but to help us grow.